Band photo courtesy Elvis Died For Your Sins
I'm not referring to famous musicians who signed off on a marketing program after quickly pounding glasses of the three different blends offered them in an attempt to give the product a bouquet of authenticity, and I'm certainly not referring to winemakers with discernible musical talent.* No, it is the ludicrous claim that the common possession of hair, personality and a microphone make one like the other. It does not. Nor does a bad drug habit, especially if acquired by a bad winemaker.** Working a crowd is the provenance of stand up comedians, motivational speakers, and recently paroled salesmen at seminars; while musicians may do so, it is not their primary activity, unless they suck.*** If a winemaker is like a musician, the comparison should rather be with the serious guitarist working on his masterpiece in the studio for months unto years, not the howling clown deafening a horde of unruly drunks with the same stupid song he's been performing for decades.
Though when was the last time you heard a winemaker say something original?
* Among whom I can be numbered, as an audience consisting of my loyal fans quickly discerns that I have almost no talent in the few moments before my "voice" burns out and/or I forget the lyrics.
** We do not confuse Dee Dee Ramone with - well, there used to be two Paso vintners named Shannon. I refer to the forcibly retired one.
*** Something my loyal fans yell at high volume when I'm onstage; to acknowledge the accuracy of their judgement and their saliva, I stage-dive on them. I'm quite good at that, at least.