.

An objective evaluation of the new Pink Zeppelin.

2012-02-07T10:36:00.000-08:00

Minions and bouncer agree, it's the best pink swill ever!

Is this a Pink Zeppelin? Sort of.

2012-01-13T15:39:00.000-08:00

Ladies, gentlemen and fruit flies; friends, family, fans and stalkers, this is quite possibly the best pink wine I've made since the last one. How's that for hype?

One pallet of wine (56 cases) of Grenache, with minor amounts of Syrah, Mourvedre and Cinsault; most of the Grenache is from the Colossus of Rhones vineyard, which yielded less than one ton per acre. Fresh strawberries and cherries, bone dry, crisp acidity, lively palate that almost fizzes. I'd call this the perfect summer wine, but of course I'll be out of it - the wine, that is - long before it gets hot. So you should probably order it now, before it's bottled.

Oh wait, I haven't priced it yet!

Wine preservation systems.

2012-01-04T09:24:00.000-08:00

What do I think of wine dispensing equipment that claims to preserve a partial bottle of wine for weeks? Slightly better than the risible pump vacuum stopper system, which removes one or two psi of pressure, leaving the other 85%+ of air inside the bottle. Pouring half a bottle of wine into a 375ml bottle immediately is plausible (though the bottle should be sparged with N2 first or better yet done inside a flushed cabinet) but this isn't what happens in the machines I see employed at wine bars.
One might as well open a bottle, pour it into ice cube trays, freeze the cubes, then microwave them individually when ordered. I'm sure some ass could invent the machine, and sell it to the credulous - of course, the biodynamic microwave costs extra.

A partial explanation of bottle shock.

2011-12-16T15:46:00.000-08:00

A variable slight reduction in aroma and light to moderate reduction in flavor caused by reaction of molecular S with remaining O2 dissolved in wine that occurs after bottling, and can be ameliorated by lowering dissolved 02 in wine to under 1 ppm before bottling, not adding large amounts of SO2 immediately prior to bottling, and not filtering. It's generally observed between 10 and 30 days after bottling. Effects not fully understood as perception is mainly subjective; it allegedly affects Pinot Noir more than other wines.

I went to Berkeley, not Davis. Somebody check with a 'real' winemaker!

NEW RELEASE: 2010 COLOSSUS SYRAH, PASO ROBLES

2011-12-07T09:47:00.000-08:00

78% "Colossus of Rhones" aka Gill Vineyard.; 22% Secret Syrah (sorry)
17% alcohol by volume (yes, really). 111 cases bottled, $50/retail.

This clone 877 Syrah vineyard on the west side of Paso Robles was planted in 1998 and only yields 1-2 bottles per vine (aka tons/acre at 1,000 vines/acre). I instituted severe leaf thinning when I became the consultant last year, and delayed harvest until full flavor ripeness and seed lignification, which didn't occur until over 28 brix. Fear not, this is no flabby, sweet, baked raisin wine; the blackberry extract is fresh and extremely full and rich, and spices and oak emerge immediately, and the finish is very long without excess heat. Do NOT be ideo-enologically prejudiced against the high alcohol and youth; it shows fabulously and is at least my best red since the 2005 La Mort Du Roi (Elvis Died For Your Sins) "Hill of Graceland" Syrah. So far, opinions are rapturous from the handful of consumers, uber-winemakers, and unter-sommeliers that have tried it. But what do we know???

Nobody's perfect.

2011-11-06T07:03:00.000-08:00

Colossus of Rhones, Gill Vineyard, West Paso.
4.1 acres clone 877 Syrah

Estimated yield 4 tons
Actual yield 3.9 tons

Target brix 28
Actual brix 28.0

(Indecent accuracy)

DEATH TO THE INFIDEL ZINFANDEL!

2011-10-14T18:53:00.000-07:00

Actually, Petite Sirah, Syrah, and Zinfandel. With bacon.

This is wine club only, needless to say.

Yes, that's a real picture of the prophet Mohammed with a Zeppelin

2011-09-24T08:39:00.000-07:00

The prophet Mohammed, waking up on Satan's couch with a terrible hangover, saw the label of the wine he'd been drinking last night; something from the New World that Jesus's friend, that singer with the big hair, had sent down as an Easter present. "Contains BACON?!?" yelled Mohammed . . . and then it came back to him that he'd known that when he drank the third bottle. Hmmm . . . he'd better go see Moses about the kosher stuff, and then figure out how to get his own Halal wine made. What to call it? Infidel Zeppelin? Kevin Bacon Fatwa?

So When's The Next Raging Party, Dude?

2011-08-14T08:32:00.000-07:00

"and can my group play? We're a really tasty Steve Miller tribute band, and we rock the house!"

Well, this hasn't happened to me yet, though between the paint fumes and the brick stain of the new winery office / tasting room I'm not sure I'd notice. Until we have locks on the doors I'm not willing to put up any artwork worth more than $10, which is rather limiting. Of the $5,000 computer/cash register / massage therapist, I will say nothing except that if you buy something that expensive you perhaps should have a security system that goes with it. And we will also have wine, some of it of sufficiently stellar quality to make it rather expensive, and swanky and clever furniture and other items made from wine barrels.

I'm wondering if we can get a motion sensing device that dispenses meth directly into the nearest raccoon den? We still have a lot left over after our last white wine bottling, abalone shell scouring, and use as floor cleaner; you pick up the oddest things at law enforcement agency auctions.

(I didn't even know there was a "Panamint County" but they seemed happy to make the sale.)

A troll in the fog; tales of "Wet Zeppelin One"

2011-08-01T03:47:00.000-07:00

A trollish person of uncertain origin* is telling tales about Wet Zeppelin I, the Cal Poly viticultural scholarship held on Sept. 25, 2009 at the Cayucos Veterans Hall, to anyone who will listen. I've only heard his nutty exaggerations and distortions secondhand; he seems to be claiming that anything named Wet Zeppelin is a drug fueled abomination that must be forbidden, or something of that nature. He has not been polite to persons unwilling to listen to his tale.

I've organized twelve events - birthday parties and scholarship fundraisers, none for profit - many with a 'Wet Zeppelin' name, in the past few years; this one was completely unique in one respect. The Lions Club contract for Veterans Hall rental includes a charge for uniformed security; the security is hired by the Lions Club, and was scheduled to arrive at 6 PM on the date of the event. No one showed, so I called the Lions Club. When they arrived 90 minutes later, I noticed that one of the three 'guards' was quite short, older than I, and did not seem alert.** (The other two were alert, but young and not imposing.) This person was apparently assigned the back door, where he proceeded to get drunk and chat up women; this was mentioned by several persons.

About an hour later, I and several others personally observed him stagger through the front foyer (where we were checking IDs, collecting donations, and wristbanding attendees by age) and out into the night. I found and informed the other two guards, who immediately both went out looking for him and did not return (without him) for at least thirty minutes. During this period and afterwards, dozens of unauthorized persons went in the back door, and came and went as they pleased. Some of these persons stole and presumably consumed wine, attacked performing musicians and authorized attendees, and generally made a mess. One person was injured, possibly while trying to get onstage, whereupon I contacted ambulance personnel and law enforcement, to whom I clearly outlined the situation and described the security breakdown. They recommended stopping the event and I did, at about 11:45. Neither I, nor any person associated with the event except by unauthorized attendance, was cited or questioned further that night or later in connection with this. I did hear rumors, but from the less credible of my wide circle of friends and acquaintances.
And finally, if someone thinks that a painting of the death of Elvis Presley is somehow in favor of the abuse of perscription pills, they'll believe anything.

*People are describing the troll as an old, rude, do-gooder.
** The little old 'guard' is apparently known as Sleepy Gonzales.

SLACKER or INFIDEL? Yes.

2011-06-12T08:26:00.000-07:00

Too much time on the ephemeral Facebook (photos excepted) and not enough time posting here. There is in fact news: a probationary reconciliation with Red Zeppelin Winery in order to assemble a tasting room in Baja Cayucos; a new wine, the 2009 Stillman Red (no political humor, please) and of course the Infidel, which is related but not identical to the Stillman, in addition to having a jihad-worthy label. Preliminary artwork here.

Yes, that's Mohammed in Hades. He seems to have lost weight on a diet of bacon and wine.

2010 STILLMAN BROWN GRENACHE BLANC

2011-05-23T13:25:00.000-07:00

The Chateau d'Abalone is here.
Our friends out at the Ocean Rose Abalone Farm, the largest producers of abalone in the US, are always experimenting with new recipes. I'm frequently a test subject, despite not being a foodie - perhaps it's because I bring wine to the "experiments" (parties). Perhaps the voice of the late great Bill Hoppe whispered in my ear, "make a wine that goes with abalone, Swill" or perhaps it was a coastal Gale, but I have. 80% Grenache Blanc, 19% Viognier, 1% Roussanne. All stainless, bone dry, and it's acidic instead of alcoholic. Citrus, cleanliness, richness. 75 cases made, email or call me to get some. You know how to find me, right?

WET ZEPPELIN III VENUES!

2011-04-28T18:02:00.000-07:00

WET ZEPPELIN III

2011-04-13T12:17:00.000-07:00

WET ZEPPELIN III THE WILDEST WINERY PARTY IN THE WORLD MAY 4-8, SLO COUNTY CALIFORNIA

Red Zeppelin Turns 20, Drops Dead

2011-04-01T08:29:00.000-07:00

Today's the twentieth anniversary of the release of the first Red Zeppelin wine, a Rhone-ish blend with a label mocking Bonny Doon and Robert Parker. It's also the day that I leave Red Zeppelin Winery. (Not an April Fools joke, kids.)

I've already started Zeppelin Winery, and will of course continue with my other labels and some wild new projects (see below) and after an indecent interval will introduce Red Zeppelin Vineyard.

20 Years of Red Zeppelins

2011-03-15T12:23:00.000-07:00

It's been almost two decades since Rick Tharp, Dan Lewis and I pranked the most precious and most pretentious figures in the wide world of wine with the first Red Zeppelin; Rick is sadly no longer with us, and Dan is pseudo-peacefully retired somewhere between Sedona and Adobe Walls. Of our targets, the precious winemaker went on to produce lakes of grocery-store plonk, then sold the brands, and is now attempting to regain respect by going beyond biodynamic, though some of his new wines are actually pretty good. The pretentious critic has handed off the reviewing of California wine to a minion, as the pressure to award 101 points to a Paso Robles Grenache was apparently too much for him.

I'll have very big news about myself soon.

The Prophets of the Zeppelins!

2011-03-02T10:58:00.000-08:00

Jesus, Elvis and Mohammed: art in wine.

"Only a witling would rate music or food on a 100 point scale." - Swilly Idle

2011-02-19T12:37:00.000-08:00

California wineries say goodbye to Robert Parker's reviews, eh? He's done some of my friends great favors by favorably reviewing their wines, but he's a tool. Adios, pendejo.

Rock Stars

2011-01-19T14:03:00.000-08:00

Under the influence of Black Zeppelin are Ela Jaszczak (aka the Polish Rock Star) and Greglebert Torteldink of Pete The Butcher (aka Tortelvis of Dread Zeppelin). An absurd time was had by all. Where were you?

WET ZEPPELIN 2.5!

2011-01-01T21:18:00.000-08:00

Details, details.

I will bring a bottle of the best Mezcal in the world to the Kilt on Thursday. You get your signed bottle on the way OUT, hear?!?

Ela Jaszczak (just call her the Polish rock star, ok?) will be at the Full Moon on Friday. She plays, she sings, you listen. Buy her drinks.

The Dancing Cage of Love will be at STAX on Saturday. Admission is NOT guaranteed, kids.

Peace and love is here to stay, and now I can wake up and face the day

Happy happy happy all of the time, shock treatment now I'm doing fine

All Done with Gill Vineyard

2010-12-10T08:13:00.000-08:00

My most important viticultural project of the year is Gill Vineyard, on the mountainous west side of Paso Robles. It has over four acres of hillside clone 877 Syrah, of which I am a big fan, but has never had planned canopy management or been leaf thinned until this year. Results were spectacular; the wine's fantastic, though I'm a little afraid to tell you the finished alcohol. It really doesn't show 'hot' at all.

It's 35 proof.

Not your average business card -

2010-12-02T17:29:00.000-08:00

Then again, it's left unvarnished so I can write cryptic notes in the cloudspace.

"WZ2.5 1/7/11 WTF?"

Bill Hoppe, 1956-2010

2010-11-23T09:30:00.000-08:00

Wilhelm Hoppe, born in Hawaii, was a graduate of Hyde Park CIA before working at several top European restaurants and hotels, and was "the first great Central Coast chef" according to a local writer. He was loved and occasionally feared by almost everyone who knew him, and he was my best friend. I'm very upset, and I don't drink alone.

Wine and Zeppelin imagery

2010-09-08T16:32:00.000-07:00

Since 1991, every Zeppelin wine label has been the result of my imagination, improved by that of my friends and paid label designers, who are often the same people. Every few years, somebody somewhere makes a Red Zeppelin wine, usually excusing their obvious plagiarism and trademark violation by saying that they got TTB approval for the label. Amazing.

Cage dancing to Dread Zeppelin!

2010-08-16T18:59:00.000-07:00

Band boys and gatekeeper girls . . .

2010-08-16T16:18:00.000-07:00

Four of my favorite people who had never met before; Dario and Bobby came from Denver, Denise and Jennifer from Las Vegas.

the Siren, the Swanky, and Susan?

2010-08-16T16:16:00.000-07:00

Sorry, Susan, I don't have a nickname for you- yet.

Welcome to California, Twinny.

2010-08-16T16:14:00.000-07:00

Gatekeeper Twinny will not be constrained by petty regulation; extracting fundage is her only mission. (Well, not only - parenting Panda is full time as well.)

Cagemasters and gatekeepers . . .

2010-08-16T16:07:00.000-07:00

When I'm Swilly Idle, the boundaries change. Redheaded Phedre, the cagemaster, is clearly pleased.
Below: the Siren and the Panda.

The great Dario Rosa on guitar

2010-08-16T15:58:00.000-07:00

Three of the four nights featured our friend Dario Rosa and band (that's Cayucos local Tracy Morgan on drums). I first saw Dario in Telluride in 1999 in a band best described as Desi Arnaz on acid; his current style might be a bit less Latin, but it's even more fabulous.

Wet Zeppelin II

2010-08-16T15:54:00.000-07:00

This is how the party starts: he jumps out of the Zeppelin just offshore, and surfs on in.

WET ZEPPELIN T-SHIRTS!

2010-07-14T09:22:00.000-07:00

Signed by various musicians, of course. Or you can buy a virgin shirt, and stalk the star of your choice.

WET ZEPPELIN II, August 11-15, 2010

2010-05-02T10:45:00.001-07:00

Yes indeed, five nights (and one day) of mayhem at the Wildest Winery Party in the World. The musical lineup is not dissimilar to last year's debacle (Wet Zeppelin I, aka Altamont by-the-Sea) but this time Dread Zeppelin will play outside their hotel rooms. We will have several different venues, in SLO, Los Osos, and of course Cayucos, though not including the insecure Vets Hall. (Honestly, how did they come to hire Sleepy Gonzales to mind the back door?)
MORE TO COME!

RockNRoll Wine at Caesar's Palace

2010-04-18T10:25:00.000-07:00

Scary picture, eh? I don't think I'm mentioned in Gibbon's "Decline and Fall" but doubtless my ancestors contributed.

Hugh Hefner's monkey and Red Zeppelin Vinidiction -

2010-03-13T10:31:00.000-08:00

That sounds like the opening line of a joke, doesn't it?

Bunnies in the Cellar

2010-03-11T19:06:00.000-08:00

The wine flowed like blood, and the blood flowed like wine.

2010-03-11T18:18:00.000-08:00

The Ninth Annual WeHo (West Hollywood, ahem) LGBT (you do know what that stands for, right) Awards were held at the Playboy Mansion on March 8, 2010 -and I was asked to pour the Pink Zeppelin, among other selections of my swill. Naturally, I accepted.

Two big pink boys, no?

The Wildest Winery Party in the World

2010-02-26T10:59:00.000-08:00

"The Wildest Winery Party in the World" will be held August 11-15, 2010, at Cayucos and beyond. Referring to it as the wildest in the world seems a seamy, unseemly boast - but I've never heard word of its rival; certainly not from anyone who was at "Altamont-by-the-Sea" last year.

"In the Shadow of the Red Zeppelin" by Adam Licsko, 2010. Now part of the Zeppelin Gallery!

2010-01-27T13:21:00.000-08:00

Seventh Heaven Vineyard in the spring . . .

2010-01-25T14:23:00.000-08:00

That little dark green patch to the right of the avocado orchard in the middle distance is our test planting of Pinot Noir. The slope behind it, and to the right (uphill) is all plantable, and there's another area out of sight downhill and to the left, below the Lenet's house, that has a smaller planting. That's Cayucos Creek Vineyard, so named by yours truly. It is not a tributary of the Armagosa, if you were wondering . . .

I really need to get this wine released, but . . .

2010-01-10T22:20:00.000-08:00

Bottling next week, I swear!

How to make Fulkerson's Red Zeppelin at home!

2009-12-25T11:50:00.000-08:00

You can make your own Fulkerson's Red Zeppelin with Welch's grape juice, some 170 proof White Mountain Magic from the neighbor's still, and a blow o' Reddi Whip to get it down. Wow, is it awful. Surpassingly awful. I think I'll bottle some and submit it to the Wine Enthusiast and Wine Spectator, just to see if their scale goes below 50 points.

CAYUCAPALOOZA: WET ZEPPELIN II

2009-12-13T15:06:00.000-08:00

Next year's party, "Cayucapalooza: Wet Zeppelin II" will be a five day event - August 11-15 - ranging from Seventh Heaven Vineyard to Hoppe's Garden Bistro and the Old Cayucos Tavern.

Our old friends the Dancing Cage of Impossible Hotness and Donald-Elvis will of course be there, as will Dario Rosa and Dread Zeppelin: except this time you'll get to see them. We have several surprises in store for you that don't involve getting a concussion, unless you get in my way.

We will not be having any events at the Borracho Vortex, er, Vet's Hall, so we'll have more resources available for musicians and of course our Cal Poly Wine & Viticulture scholarship.

Mark your calendar . . . you do have a 2010 calendar, don't you?

Out on the tiles!

2009-12-06T10:43:00.000-08:00

Cropped ZZ Top or Blues Brother?

Seventh Heaven Vineyard

2009-12-02T19:44:00.000-08:00

In declining order, we have planted Pinot Noir clones 777, 667, 115, and, er, 666, all on 1103P: a total of 500 vines on two experimental lots; the upper, at 450'+, is the larger. This is first leaf and just trellised; next year we'll make a bit of pink, and leave some clusters to see what kind of ripeness we get. Fun, eh?

How to party in Las Vegas

2009-10-27T21:33:00.000-07:00

In Las Vegas with Denise Dee and Jennifer Cook of the Highwood Ave. Adjunct Drinking Club, and Sonny Barton and Chris Hammond of RockNRoll Wine. Yes, I am wearing a Queers shirt.

The Cage at Wet Zeppelin: worth 999 words?

2009-10-18T11:14:00.000-07:00

Wet Zeppelin Massacre: Altamont-By-The-Sea!

2009-10-04T14:26:00.000-07:00

(At left, Jennifer K. behind Jake's 'security' mask)

By now, even most of the people who missed Wet Zeppelin know that I was encouraged by local law enforcement to shut the party down just before midnight: Dread Zeppelin never played at all! The venue had hired the security guards, one of whom got drunk and staggered off leaving the back door unguarded, to the delight of a parking lot full of thirsty yahoos who got into the wine supply with stunning results. People were driving into public buildings, jumping off the pier at low tide, and climbing on the peaked roof of the Vets Hall. There were fights outside, drunken jealous husbands invading the women's room and throwing chairs at the walls, and hammered punks moshing and jumping onstage repeatedly until the musicians kicked them off bleeding. The owner of the Old Cayucos Tavern said that she had never seen that many ambulances, fire trucks and police cars in town before. In other words, it was a huge success. Oh yes, the bands were awesome, and we raised thousands for the Wine & Viticulture scholarship, but we'll have more about that in later posts. We're still reviewing the video evidence with our attorneys, ahem. Actually . . . there's been nothing in the papers . . . just as well, eh?

Another "Red Zeppelin" imitator?

2009-09-24T12:35:00.000-07:00

It's getting more frequent, it seems. I'm sure the owner of this Washington State winery hears a lot of jokes about his name: Jim Page. But how he got the idea that he could call a wine Red Zeppelin when I've had the trademark and used it continually for over eighteen years, I don't know. Maybe he's an attorney with a bad attitude, or perhaps he doesn't own a computer. We'll find out.

UPDATE: "We only made two barrels, and we're sold out." Yeah, you are.

Brown goods don't make it?

2009-09-20T18:37:00.000-07:00

Just an ice tea. At the Galley, Morro Bay CA

One week to go!

2009-09-18T13:10:00.000-07:00

Since serious planning for this event started in February, it's gratifying and exciting to realize that it's less than 170 hours away - and with winery and vineyard making their own demands, not to mention family, friends and fans, the additional time and thought required to deal with unassembled dancing cages, efficient wine dispensing equipment, radical venue decoration, colorful handouts, security considerations, and shuffling Elvis impersonators and other (dare I say real? - no, I don't) rock stars amongst hotel rooms, I think I'll sit down for a minute and write a blog post. Wasn't that fun?

Wet Zeppelin Video

2009-09-14T20:30:00.000-07:00

Courtesy of the mighty Tortelvis, twenty seconds

of the finest Cayucos wine and cheese!

Musicans at Wet Zeppelin!

2009-09-11T21:18:00.000-07:00

With the perhaps timely demise of the Flying Mambos (surfers put guitars down, pick up bongs and fly to Sumatra) we can breathe slightly easier . . . we have a wealth of incredibly talented musicians, and only one party to feature them at! That means that everyone else can do one more song. We also have the awesome Taco Temple as our protein concessionaire, serving from 6ish until the food runs out . . .

Where the party is, where to stay. Questions?

2009-08-31T15:28:00.000-07:00

WET ZEPPELIN IS A SCHOLARSHIP BENEFIT!

2009-08-09T16:22:00.000-07:00

Our last three wild winery events have been birthday parties limited to a couple of hundred invitees, but now it's time to go big. As there's a burgeoning Wine and Viticulture major at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo, we thought that we would make our next event a scholarship benefit for deserving students, to be selected by Stillman in consultation with faculty. Please donate generously, or at least as much as you would spend if you had to pay for the wine that you'll drink! We're also looking for volunteers to help with checking people in, designing and building sets and decorations, and helping Stillman manage the musicians. Well, maybe not the last one.

To offer help or find out more, email StillmanB@aol.com or call him at 805-550-6492. Thanks!

A Brief History of A Dozen Years of Partying, part 1

2009-08-04T10:25:00.000-07:00

This is what started it all. Possibly worth re-reading, even if you were a recipient . . .

April 21, 1997

Stillman Brown

Your Name
Somewhere Out There
Our Mailing List

Dear Friend, (insert actual name here if person is really important)

We know you get a lot of mail from wineries and wine-related businesses, and most of it is junk. So many points, so little wine, so give us your credit card number. Well, this would have been one of those letters, if only we had any sense . . . the wineries and wine shops that do that sort of thing seem to make money at it. But who needs money?

This is an exclusive invitation to attend a major historical event. In the tradition of the humane, selfless aristocrats of the European Renaissance, men and women of honor who, inspired by their holy faith, bequeathed subsequent generations of humanity some of the greatest works of art the world has ever beheld, we have commissioned a painting. The artist is a heretofore unknown genius; and the subject is the defining cultural and religious event of the twentieth century, which was not fully recognized until recently.

At 6 P.M. on Friday, May 2, 1997, at the London Wine Bar at 415 Sansome Street in downtown San Francisco, California, we will unveil for the first time a painting by Robert Cochran, “The Death Of Elvis Presley.” We hope that you will be able to attend.

Yours,

(sign here if hand is steady enough)

Stillman Brown
Jory Winery

WET ZEPPELIN band lineup expands!

2009-07-01T20:41:00.000-07:00

As you can plainly see from our poster above (once your eyes adjust to the flames) we have recruited several more phenomenal musical acts for Wet Zeppelin. We're also seeking set designers, who will doubtless tell us that our idea for launching the Cayucos Veterans Hall into the Pacific Ocean at the end of the party is perhaps overly ambitious. Fine - what's YOUR idea?!?

Twitter attacks Blog, defended by Godzilla!

2009-06-30T09:26:00.000-07:00

Just in case you're not following me on Twitter, here are some of my recent hits. Warning: may induce ADD in just about everyone.

In North Carolina, I just saw a roadside establishment named "Midget's Grooming Station." I was happy to see the apostrophe!
I didn't know "Hang down your head, Noam Chomsky" was a traditional Yiddish folk tune.
2007 Tudor Tondre PN best wine I've had from this vineyard!
Okay, the moment of respectful silence is over. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a Disney movie?
A Disney movie can still touch children.
Apparently Elvis was beating the hell out of Michael Jackson, until Jesus calmed him down.
Off to the Warped tour with Luke. Not much mourning of MJ today, I suspect.
I've seen 9 count 'em 9 people my age or more here, but I've only looked at a thousand or so! "Warped" tour, Ventura - Punk by the Pacific
Never goes into the first mosh pit - especially when somebody threw a full garbage can into it.
What kind of old school punk band has a keyboard player anyway?
Mosh pit! Made it out alive, the only man over 25.

Bad Corks

2009-06-23T11:43:00.001-07:00

Long time consumers of my swill, doubtless numbering into the millions, may have noted that I haven't used what are disingenuously known as "natural" corks in quite a while. (I call the people who offer them "mold salesmen.") The last straw on this flying monkey's back was the 20+% TCA rate in the "natural" Suncorks used on my 2000 Jory Winery "Lock Vineyard" Paso Robles Syrah. I have used Neocorks for several years with complete satisfaction. They're the ones that have a foamlike core exposed at either end, and a solid, often colored, on the surface that touches the interior of the bottle's neck. I often put flying Zeppelins on the outside, unless the supplier wants more money for the printing than they do for the corks themselves. Of course, my complete satisfaction is not the wine bartenders, as putting a Neocork back into the bottle is not easy, especially if the wine has been bottled recently. Neocorks cost about the same as inexpensive 'natural' corks.
I'm also a big fan of screwcaps, particularly the 7-layer Alvis type (they have a tin liner on the bottom, as opposed to exposed white foam) though the surface area that's sealed is only that of the very top of the bottle, a narrow ring, which is vulnerable to a blow or a long period of overpressure, such as when pallets of wine are stacked four high. The screwcap/bottle combination costs a bit more than the cork-finished type.
My Stillman wines use Diam "corks" which are made from a very finely ground 'corkburger' that is purged with supercritical CO2 which removes the TCA compounds, and then 'glued' together with some foodie-happy compounds. They work perfectly, though they look cheap. They're not.
The worst closure, in my not so humble opinion, is the so-called 1+1, which consists of visibly irregular small chunks of corkburger, glued together with corkdust, with a thin disk of solid cork at each end. The center sections of these corks very frequently have enough TCA that you can smell it just by breaking the corks open and applying one half-cork to each nostril. The thin discs at each end are usually permeated within a year or so, allowing the TCA in the corkburger to contaminate the wine.
Guess which cork is most commonly used in inexpensive plonk?

WET ZEPPELIN UPDATE!

2009-06-11T08:34:00.000-07:00

Ladies, gentlemen, and fruit flies, we have contracted with Bill Gaines Audio of San Luis Obispo to provide a state-of-the-art, Hammer-Of-The-Gods sound system for Wet Zeppelin. While we will provide complimentary earplugs for those of you who require perfect hearing in order to still-hunt monkeys in the forest primeval, we will not be turning the amps up to 11; we just want very high quality sound. Also note the presence of a few bands you may not have heard of, but be assured of their musical quality and entertainment value. And, yes, the Dancing Cage of Love will make another appearance this year.

Wine Critics and Ethics? LMAO

2009-05-26T09:08:00.000-07:00

Today's Wall Street Journal has a piece on the free trips taken by writers for Robert Parker's 'Wine Advocate' at: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124330183074253149.html. Apparently one writer, after a trip to a continent that dare not speak its name (Ba-a-a-a-a-a!) proceeded to give the wines of the importer who hosted him an average score of 92, which seems rather high if you include the specimens of raisin soup unsaid continent is famous for.
To give a little background, Mr. Parker burst upon the scene many years ago in high dudgeon against the wine critics of the day, who he accused of being a pack of sticky-fingered shills. He then proceeded to careen wildly down the road in the manner of his professed idol, the notorious crank Ralph Nader, often either overpraising or scourging wineries - sometimes the same wineries, as in the unfortunate cases of Randall Grahm and Tim Mondavi. When he started a winery in Oregon with his brother-in-law, he solemnly promised never to review his own wines (such forbearance) but then proceeded to use the mailing list he had acquired as a critic to offer the wines to his subscribers; rather like Consumer Reports offering its own toasters. (An apt metaphor given the level of new oak in the wines.)
I am not really so quick to judge, having bought the late wine critic Jerry Mead, a fabulous mercenary, dinner on occasion; and I hesitantly admit to giving a discount to any wine critic that buys my swill by the case; the same discount I give my friends, family and fans when they do. I really should be more corrupting!

Finally bottled the White Zeppelin today!

2009-05-14T17:25:00.000-07:00

So the White Zep has been screwed. Because I added a whiff of Velcorin, I can't try the wine until tomorrow (if you don't know, I'll tell you someday) but I'm really really really looking forward to it; I think it's the best white wine I've bottled in several years. Stay tooned!

The Winemaker's Night Out

2009-05-12T12:53:00.001-07:00

So in addition to hanging out with other winemakers and chefs, I know some musicians. Above, my pal Nemesis Enforcer of Sexy Time Explosion, backstage before the show. I sang a song with them ("Selfdestructo Bust" by Turbonegro), did an Iggy Pop stage dive and was crowd surfed to safety with nary a button popped from my vintage pink suit.

Punk rock ain't what it used to be.

WET ZEPPELIN Sept. 25, 2009, Cayucos CA

2009-05-05T20:25:00.000-07:00

Note the minor changes; the party is from 2 pm until 2 am, the donation is requested but undefined (an amount in dollars just below legal drinking age is proper, unless you want to wind up in the dancing cage with Mr. Bunnypants) and Sexy Time Explosion is replaced by Meth Leopard, a band that consists of the same musicians. We are auditioning musicians as I write!

Hospice du Rhone 2009, part 2

2009-05-03T10:46:00.000-07:00

Though I heard mutterings about the parochial focus of the seminars from people who weren't going to attend anyway, I was more than happy to see California in the spotlight at HdR this year; it's not as if it's going to happen on a regular basis. I'm a nasty critic, but to my ear only one speaker talked too much on stage, and only one prevaricated for commercial gain. That's nothing compared to what goes on at non-wine industry conferences! I thought Sashi Moorman from Stolpman Vineyards was this year's star, as he shoveled forth information on clone/vineyard trials that point the way to the future of Central Coast Syrah. We can all agree that there is 'too much Syrah' out there (there's too much of every varietal, if you count the Merde!) but Stolpman, which started out with high yields and mediocre wines, has accomplished a stunning transformation.

Hospice du Rhone 2009, part 1

2009-04-30T16:52:00.000-07:00

The world's most prestigious celebration of Rhone varietals, or America's at least, has now begun. The Syrah Shootout just ended, with 45 wines judged, of which the Stillman clone 877 came in 4th; the Four Vines One Tree Hill was first, which is not exactly hard to take as the owners and winemakers are good friends . . .

WET ZEPPELIN Sept. 25, 2009 in Cayucos CA

2009-04-15T18:10:00.000-07:00

As some of you know, I like to throw parties; this will be the biggest in several years (since Black Velvet Voodoo in April '01, in fact!) and possibly the best. Some of the information is on the poster, shown above; to get a pdf of it for printing yourself, send me an email at StillmanB@aol.com. Yes, you're invited.
This is the wildest winery party you'll ever attend, period. Next to the pier in beautiful Cayucos, California, an extravaganza of music and wine. The dress code? Impress, improvise, disguise. Think of a surfing Elvis, tikis in Vegas, and a Mardi Gras masquerade ball all rolled into one and served hot. Featuring our official band, the one and only Dread Zeppelin, the great Dario Rosa, the dangerous Sexy Time Explosion, and an open wine bar hosted by Red Zeppelin Winery! $20 donation benefits local surf and wine education charities.

Facebook won!

2009-04-14T12:53:00.000-07:00

Well, you know the story; between my travels and my absurd ADD, both this blog and even MySpace updates have fallen off the tractor and into the weeds. I really oughta put up one more Wine and Roses picture, though . . .

Sioux City Wine and Roses

2009-04-05T19:41:00.000-07:00

The lost member of the Lewis and Clark expedition?

Scene from a back road to Las Vegas

2009-03-26T17:01:00.000-07:00

White Zeppelin

2009-03-26T04:37:00.000-07:00

The 2008 White Zeppelin, a blend of 83+%Viognier with Roussanne Grenache Blanc, and Picpoul Blanc, is ready for bottling. But the label is not designed yet; as there are more people involved in the process than usual, and they are never all in the same room, it's draggin' on and on. Here is Version VI, it's not there for me.

Wine bar joke

2009-03-15T16:17:00.000-07:00

So this guy walks into a wine bar, and says “How about a nice White Zin?” The bartender, who is moonlighting as a sommelier (or is it the other way around?) offers him a dry Rosé, and lets him try a sip to see if he likes it. Well, the guy doesn’t like it, or the next wine, or the next one. Riesling, Chardonnay, Merlot, Pinot Noir, Zinfandel, Syrah, he hates ’em all. There’s a line of glasses on the bar in front of him with a little bit in each one. So what does the guy do? He pours them all into one glass and drinks it off. “Now that’s what I call wine,” he says, “I’d like a full bottle, please!”
The sommelier gives him a long look, and then reaches under the bar and presses a button. Out of the back room steps a huge man with hands the size of Grenache clusters. The sommelier points his finger at the door and says, “Wilhelm . . . show this gentleman a nice Yellow Cab.”

The origin of the "Red Zeppelin" name.

2009-03-11T17:28:00.000-07:00

My first Red Zeppelin wine was released in 1991, as I have noted in my previous post on the "False Zeppelin." The name is indeed a pun on the rock band, but it only arrived in my brain after a jetstream of consciousness derailed my train of thought (ha!) about another wine label. Many people seem to think that Bonny Doon was the first California winery to have silly labels. (In fact, Thomas Kruse in neighboring Gilroy was first.) The now-famous label above, first used on a 1984 California Rhone blend, wittily if a bit preciously relates the tale of the village of Chateauneuf du Pape's 1953 ordinance banning the landing of UFOs in local vineyards, the purported result of a cigar-shaped "flying saucer" scare. As something of a skeptic in these matters (I'll relate my Roswell tale another time) I considered the tale, and it seemed to me that the stereotypically excitable Frenchmen were suffering from postwar stress syndrome; indeed, unconsciously recalling an incident from the Great War. The Germans used rigid airships extensively in WW1, though the technology wasn't up to the mission. One large Zeppelin raid on London was hit by unexpected high winds (perhaps the then-undiscovered jetstream) that blew the dirigibles astray; some crashed in France, one was never found. The crash of a huge airship, filled with hydrogen gas and containing toxic metals, into a valuable vineyard just before harvest would be terrible indeed: explosions, mangled vines and twisted wreckage, the Germans stuffing their faces with Grenache . . . . I saw it all clearly, as through an overfined Marsanne. And then the name came to me: Red Zeppelin. As I was already interested in adding Rhone varietals to our lineup at Jory Winery, I knew I had the name for my new wine. As for the label design, Rick Tharp and I thought we would have a little fun; but that's a tale for later.

Wine goddesses shocked by Stillman's decrepit pedicure! Since remedied.

2009-03-08T12:32:00.000-07:00

Some of my favorite Pinot Noirs from WOP.

2009-03-08T12:20:00.000-07:00

2006 Tudor Balo Vyd, 92
2007 Kosta Browne - all 90+, the Amber Hill is maybe a 94.
2006 Skewis Bush Vyd, 91
2007 Nautilus (Kiwi), 91+
2007 Saintsbury Toyon, 93?
2006 Paraiso West Terrace, Smith vyd. 92
2006 Morgan Double L, 92.
2006 Pillow Road, 86
2006 Calcareous York Mtn, 88. 32 proof!

Looking for California

2009-03-01T13:00:00.000-08:00

On a dark desert highway, why the grafitti? I had a fabulous time and made fabulous new contacts hanging out with my fabulous friends in fabulous Las Vegas, but I loved the drive home alone. Alone: in bad company, as my cousin Ambrose wrote.
Here, the Providence Mountains, with unprovidential foreground.

Parched, sir, simply parched; the Kelso Dunes. Is there a wine bar nearby, at the infamous hotel?

In the desert, I can't remember your name

2009-02-24T17:38:00.000-08:00

So much for daily posting, eh? Well, the weekend before last the Siren and I went to LA to hang with our Santa Monica peoples (Van, Kelly and Brian, yes) and see Dread Zeppelin at the House of Blues. I learned two things; that if calamari tastes a bit off you should throw it out and not let your loved one eat it, and that a great band benefits from a great sound system. I'm really going to have to step up sonically the next time they do a show for me, which is Sunday, Aug. 16 in Cayucos.
Last weekend I did a wine bar in Apple Valley, (the excellent Casa de Vino) followed by a house party in Hendertucky, NV (aka Baja Vegas) followed by biz meetings in Lake Havasu, AZ (actually onshore, to my relief) followed by wine and brilliant blather in Cottonwood. Above, I embrace my bestest friend Elvis Kokopelli, wielding the first "Stillman" (a mixological monstrosity I had no tongue in the concoction of) ever seen or tasted within a hundred miles of Graceland Southwest, Rest Area 51, Sedona Arizona!

The 2007 Stillman Syrah, clone 877

2009-02-12T17:05:00.000-08:00

Ladies, gentlemen and fruit flies, this, the second vintage of my awesome clone 877 Syrah from the mysterious Arroyo Seco appellation in Monterey has even more cool-climate pepper than its predecessor, along with a beautiful black-fruit palate, refined balance, and just enough tannic structure to remind you that it is not a Pinot Noir. (Although some Pinot Noirs selling for twice or thrice are apparently trying to be Syrah, ahem.) The wine is priced at $33 retail per bottle, however those of you intrepid enough to email or call me (StillmanB@aol.com, 805-550-6492) will find me ready to grant you wholesale pricing, assuming you don't want me to ship one bottle to your aunt in Sumatra.

The False Zeppelin

2009-02-12T15:24:00.000-08:00

This label looks somewhat familiar, doesn't it? It's from a Finger Lakes, New York winery that started using this name in 1995, four years after I got national press and ratings for Jory Red Zeppelin, and two years after my wine got distribution in New York state. Somehow they came up with this idea all by themselves soon after; quite remarkable. (Kindly note that the US Navy Akron seen on their label was a Zeppelin design built by Goodyear; it met a bad end.) We, and our attorneys, have been in touch with them over the years, and it was understood that they would confine their presence to their home counties. In return for our being nice guys, they are now selling this over the internet, shipping to nine states, and confusing the heck out of anyone who searches for Red Zeppelin Wine. They claim that they only ship the wine as "Fulkerson's Zeppelin" outside New York, but that just shows me that they know they're full of, er, hydrogen sulfide?

Black Zeppelin review

2009-02-10T09:19:00.000-08:00

The Beverage Tasting Institute, which conducts the World Wine Championships, to be seen at Tastings.com, has just rated the '05 Black Zeppelin - with a 92, which I think is about its average score so far, yawn. I liked the last line of their description: "amazing balance for its weight." It makes me think of W.C. Fields.

Rollin rollin rollin, keep those Zeppelins rollin

2009-02-08T10:04:00.000-08:00

Food and wine, humbug!

2009-02-05T11:53:00.000-08:00

I'm rather fond of garlic, but I don't think it belongs in guacamole. Especially not in nervous-Transylvanian-virgin quantities. Yet twice this week I've almost tasted the best avocados in the world (they come from Cayucos) only to Down Chip and palate-brokenly drift away, because of O.G. For that matter I don't care for Operation Ivy levels of jalapeno, and I'd rather spend an hour in a phone booth with Noam Chomsky than taste fresh cilantro.

Please note that none of these flavors go with wine.

Wine and football?

2009-02-01T12:50:00.000-08:00

Though we have been tackled by the flu, the Siren and I are determined to go to fellow winemaker Steve Kroener's (http://www.silverhorse.com/) Super Bowl party in Paso Robles today, perhaps even in time to see the last two minutes of the game. Alexis's brother played 14 seasons in the NFL (center, Bears and Saints) during which she paid 14 seconds of attention to the game, and I stopped caring when Al Davis let go of Kenny Stabler, so we'll doubtless be paying more attention to the bar than the screen, and certainly dress to amuse the other guests.

Why Elvis died for your sins

2009-01-25T20:42:00.000-08:00

By now some of you know that a year or so ago I got TTB approval for a label featuring a painting I commissioned and own of Elvis Presley's ignominious end. The consequences of a wine-free lifestyle that included a whole lotta food and pills, the immoral of the story should be obvious. (Note the bottles of Red Zeppelin under the counter.) The wine itself is an alcoholic fraternal twin sister of the Black Zeppelin, and no slouch. I wish I had more than two or three cases left. For a better look with musical accompaniment, go to www.ElvisDiedForYourSins.com

The identical twins of Red Zeppelin

2009-01-25T16:32:00.000-08:00

At the RockNRoll Wine event at LAX nightclub, in the Luxor in Las Vegas. It was as fun as it was loud!

The Road to Las Vegas

2009-01-23T10:58:00.000-08:00

The experience of driving to Las Vegas is full of wonders, especially if you take the long way through Panamint and Death Valleys. When I found out yesterday that the Interstate was temporarily closed between the Giant Butt Thermometer and the Rusting Rollercoaster of Death (the landmarks of Baker and Primm, respectively) I took a third route, continuing east from Barstow and then taking desert roads through Kelso and Nipton. I only broke 100 mph twice.
At bottom, the tracks at the Kelso depot, looking west at sunset.

Family Hit and Run!

2009-01-20T14:01:00.000-08:00

Italian Nut Job or Grand Theft Morro? Some little meth freak from the neighboring burg of Atrashcadero went on a wild ride yesterday in a yellow Mini Cooper (a.k.a. BMW Zero-series) that left him in the hands of the law; among other acts of genius, he sideswiped the Swamp Siren's Corolla at 100 mph on Highway 1 just north of Morro Bay. My sons John and Jake were also in her car, and today Jake replaced the driver-side mirror that was the only casualty. (Another reason to like narrow cars.) The CHP said the driver of the ugly little thing was on alcohol and drugs, though I'm guessing there wasn't any Syrah involved.

Pink Zeppelin and Dario Rosa

2009-01-18T23:42:00.001-08:00

The 2008 Pink Zeppelin is out of bottle shock, and how. Elvis knows its better than almost all the white wines out there. I'm having my first glass now!

Did I mention that it's Dario Rosa's birthday today? Three years ago in Denver, we drank a gallon of Pink Zeppelin (the 2005 vintage) and if we hadn't also been doing shots of absinthe and scotch we probably wouldn't have had hangovers at all.

An evening in Cayucos

2009-01-17T16:56:00.000-08:00

For my 50th birthday I rented the Passive-Aggressive Hippie Barn (not its real name) on Cayucos Creek Road, just north of town, hiring Dread Zeppelin to play (see photo at top of this page). The barn owner was 'a real trip' to deal with. As he's turning 55 today and throwing his own party, I plan on attending and being as disruptive as possible; maybe I'll bring the spear I'm going to use to keep the wild pigs out of the vineyard.

Atomic bomb vs. Zeppelin

2009-01-15T10:56:00.000-08:00

I can't get over this picture from a book I got at the Atomic Testing Museum in Vegas last weekend. What the f@&! did they think was going to happen when they put an airship up near a nuclear explosion?!? Too funny.

Yes, I know it's a blimp, but I don't think a Zeppelin would have fared much better.

THE NIGHT THE GIRTH TOOK PILLS, TOO!

2009-01-15T10:28:00.000-08:00

Elvis, the Siren, and Swilly Idle.

With musician Mike Young, also wearing leather pants and a silver jacket. Mine is Armani, though.

THE DAY THE GIRTH TOOK PILLS!

2009-01-15T10:20:00.000-08:00

One of my very favorite events is Elvis Kokopelli's annual birthday party for Elvis Presley, held at Graceland Southwest in Sedona. I can't remember what Elvis and I were singing; probably something by Dread Zeppelin, whose lead singer Tortelvis has something of the same body type on display here. See DreadZeppelin.com

2005 Black Zeppelin

2009-01-14T13:08:00.000-08:00

This wine was relatively slow to open for at least a year after it was bottled (though it still won a stack of awards) but it's now showing dramatically well as soon as it's unscrewed. A sense of mistaken priorities on the part of one who will become nameless led to my being unable to access the primary vineyard (which I had planned the planting of) after the initial vintage, so until Red Zeppelin can plant its own vines this might be a one-off. Rare, powerful, and beautiful, and the label's not too bad either.

Inmates of the Asylum

2009-01-13T08:59:00.000-08:00

Here I be with Alexis, and Don and Shirley Regole, (party animals native to Tucson) and again below, with Paula Woolsey, the Asylum's owner. I did the first winemaker dinner there in 2002, and am still allowed back.

The Asylum in Jerome, AZ

2009-01-13T08:35:00.000-08:00

The culinary center of the blazing new Verde Valley, Arizona wine scene is the fantastic Asylum restaurant in Jerome -theasylum.biz- where I had a long liquid dinner with owner Paula Woolsey. This is the Wild West wine frontier of America, and I played a bit of a role in the early days several years ago when I spent a lot of hang time at the first winery in the area, the late great Echo Canyon. Their first Syrahs showed that the area was capable of making world class wines, and now with Page Springs and Merkin established, and PlumpJack moving in, the Verde Valley has a bright ethanolic future.

The newest wine bar in Vegas, the SleezeNCheeze!

2009-01-12T22:46:00.000-08:00

At a remote location in Baja Henderson Nevada, Flip Flop Frank and neighbors got a head start on Alexis and I, as at our earlier appointment (see the post below) we actually had to talk while others drank. We remedied this when we got to the SleezeNCheeze . . . . thanks Frank!

CES Blogger party in Vegas -

2009-01-12T22:25:00.000-08:00

Here we see the Siren and I (with Marilyn) at the awesome CES blogger party, ItWontStayInVegas.com held at the thermonuclear AtomicTestingMuseum.org on Flamingo just east of the Strip.

Of course we missed the wine library nut, Gary Vaynerchuk (http://tv.winelibrary.com/) but we poured wine for the extremely well dressed LeVar Burton, who complimented my gold suit and my Black Zeppelin, and philologist Marina Orlova of HotForWords.com who didn't blink when I mentioned pentanol and aldehydes.

Bottling on Elvis' birthday, done!!!

2009-01-08T16:31:00.000-08:00

147 cases of burning love; the 2007 Stillman Syrah, Arroyo Seco. Unfiltered, clone 877, cool climate, 2 year old French oak, minimalist label. I'll drag some with me to Vegas and Sedona for sampling, then leave it alone when bottle shock sets in late next week. It'll be fine by Valentine's Day, when I will unleash it on the novice lovers of White-Trash-By-The-Sea, also known as Cayucos, California.

Amateur lovers? Of course, just as New Year's Eve is for novice partiers.

What wine goes with wild boar?

2009-01-06T11:19:00.000-08:00

For the moment, a Tudor Pinot Noir. But since the piggies are attacking my prospective grower's other crops (avocados, berries) I think I should be proactive. Yes, that's a real spear.

The complexity of winemaking -

2009-01-04T18:28:00.000-08:00

To judge by this blog, my life is just one party after another. And that's true, though in between I have the pleasure of haranguing vineyard owners to plant what I want them to instead of what they think will sell five years from now, haggling with mendacious cork and label suppliers over wildly varying prices for the same type of product, dealing with lying wine salesmen without succumbing to enological Tourette's syndrome or just reaching for a spear, and other terroir du merde. Can't they understand that I'm an artist?

That's enough complaining for this year.

I'm really looking forward to the geek blogger party in Vegas on Friday, where I can answer my least favorite question, "So how did you become a winemaker?" with my favorite answer.
"I made the best damn pruno in San Quentin, bitch."